| |
|
|
Murphy's Law
Everything that can go wrong will go wrong.
Lorenz's Law of Mechanical
Repair
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
Beach's Law
Identical parts aren't.
Anthony's Law of
the Workshop
Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner.
Tussman's Law
Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.
Lowery's Law
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Peer's Law
The solution to a problem changes the problem.
William's Law
There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute
strength and ignorance.
IBM's Pollyanna
Principle
Machines should work. People should think.
The Dilbert Principle
The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where
they can do the least damage - management.
Ehrlich's Law
The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
Ralph's Observation
It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a
hurry.
Cannon's Comment
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the
next morning you will have a flat tire.
Cole's Law
Thinly sliced cabbage.
The Law of Common
Sense
Never accept a drink from a urologist, nor a friendly handshake from a proctologist.
The
Law of Reality
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
The Law of Avoiding
Oversell
When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
Law of Physical
Displacement
Sometimes you are the dog. Sometimes you are the hydrant.
Legal Rights
Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.
Law of Probable
Dispersal
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
Law Pertaining
to Divorce
Be a good housekeeper. When you leave him ... get a good lawyer ...keep his
house.
Handy Guide to Modern Science
If it's green or it wiggles, it's Biology.
If it stinks, it's Chemistry.
If it doesn't work, it's Physics.
© 2002-2003 Intruder Alert.Ca